The Strength of Women in Tommy Sandhu’s Life
We love strong women – they are inspirational. When strong women impact our much loved and successful celebrities, we want to know! So we asked comedian Tommy Sandhu to reflect on the undeniable influence that the women in his life, and how they have shaped him—his mother, sisters, and wife. With humour, love, and the occasional chappal (slipper), these women have left their mark on every facet of his personality, from his resilience to his comedic timing. These relationships have shaped him into the man he is today.
“I think we are always a moving, snowballing, changing entity of resilience which will reflect where we are at in our lives. However, the one thing I’ve got from the women around me is that with their beliefs in me, which I know isn’t based on any bullshit, I feel like I can achieve anything”
Let’s be honest —sometimes the best way to love your man is to lovingly (or not so lovingly!) call him out on his nonsense. A little tough love goes a long way! After all, it takes a strong woman to say, ‘Hey, stop being an “Ooloo”, now sort yourself out!’ – because real support isn’t about sugarcoating—it’s about helping him help himself. No nonsense, no drama, just the truth served straight-up, cold, and in this case, Punjabi style!
Surrounded By Strength and Resilience
“My mum loves me unconditionally, and my wife only wants the best for me. With that belief, I feel like I can achieve anything,” Tommy says. “As a performer, knowing that if nobody else wants me, I still have them, that’s my safety net.”
Tommy’s wife, Binny, is the epitome of the word “Strength”. From running marathons and conquering the Three Peaks Challenge to excelling in her fintech career—all while raising their children and supporting Tommy through ups and downs—she’s the embodiment of resilience.
“Watching her tackle life head-on is nothing short of inspiring. While I procrastinate, she just gets on with it, focusing on small, daily improvements,” Tommy admits with awe. “When you fancy someone and then get ‘wowed’ by their spirit, you realise how lucky you are.”
Mum vs. Wife: The Ultimate Feedback Duo
If Tommy’s mum and wife teamed up to give him feedback, who would be tougher? Tommy laughs, “No question—it’s my wife. She’s a feisty Midlands middle child who reacts quickly and wears her heart on her sleeve. My mum is softer in her approach, but don’t forget, I’ve taken her chappal plenty of times!”
Despite their different styles, Tommy treasures their tough love. “Strong women around us are what we boys need. We may act like we’re in control, but deep down, we’re just trying to do our best. Ladies, never underestimate your power to shape, strengthen, and even heal the men in your lives.”
It’s easy to see where Tommy is coming from. We all know those men that are in full Bollywood Style Hero mode, strutting around like they’re Amjad – Gabbar Singh Style, or Shah Rukh, Rahul Style. But here’s the plot twist: deep down, every one of those lads is winging it! They’re just big kids with beards, Hermes belts and too much Ombre Nomad cologne on, unsure of what they’re doing, but trying to hold it together.
And Tommy has his words of wisdom for the women who have men who are fronting in their lives
“… deep down, we are all unsure, uncertain and trying to do the best we can! I would want every woman out there to know that us blokes really need you. Never underestimate your power as a woman and your ability to help mould, shape, strengthen and even heal the men in your life! deep down all us boys really do need it. So, here’s to female power, keep it coming and please use it wisely!”
Old-School Wisdom Meets Modern Pragmatism
Tommy’s mum has always been a fountain of old-school wisdom. One of her gems? “There’s no harm in apologizing to defuse a situation—it’s about being bigger than the argument.” At first, Tommy thought this was a sign of weakness, but now he sees it as a strength.
That makes me love Tommy’s Mum – Auntyji has it nailed, no need to exacerbate the “Punga” – we are all so in our heads about being right, not denting our egos, sticking to the “point in principle”; because it’ll all end with “you don’t know the sacrifices” and “you’ll understand when I’m dead”…so cut that off straight away with an “I’m Sorry” and get on with what is really important.
His wife, on the other hand, approaches challenges with laser-focused practicality. “She’s a fighter who ensures her opinion is heard—sometimes loudly in her Brummie accent,” Tommy chuckles.
While Tommy’s Mum and Wife are the key influencers in his approach, the dearly departed Ms Cilla Black (yes, say it like “Our Graham” does) also gave him advice that continues to resonate.
“We worked together on Blind Date and during those years she taught me that “life is a tightrope” and in order to stay balanced you mustn’t look around and worry about what other people are saying or doing. It’s all about you and YOUR next step in order to get across!. By comparing ourselves to other people around us or wondering “what he said and she said”, we are only going to wobble ourselves on the tight rope of life. “
Absolutely, words to live by from Cilla
From Naughty Aunts to Confidence on Stage
Tommy’s comedic flair has deep roots in the women of his family. “My mum and aunts were always the life of the party—singing, dancing, and cracking jokes. My sisters were just as outgoing, performing in school plays and parties. It was normal for me to see women owning the room.”
This upbringing gave Tommy not just confidence but a sensitivity that serves him well in comedy.
“The women in my life taught me how to analyse behaviour—mine and others’. That emotional awareness is definitely a feminine quality, and it’s shaped my observational humour….by giving me all that love, and I do feel very privileged to have my mum, and two substitute mums in a way with my sisters, by having all that love, I grew up with a lot of confidence, I grew up reassured and happy in myself, because even though I was far from perfect in many things, I knew I was loved, I knew I was protected, I knew I was cared for, and they helped me analyse my relationships with the different people in my life, not only women, but men as well, and they gave me that sensitivity and awareness that I think works so well in comedy. They showed me how to break down my own behaviour, reactions, thoughts and processes, as well as other people’s, which is definitely more of a feminine quality than a masculine one. So I’m very grateful to my mum and my two sisters for shaping me to be the sensitive person that I am, and therefore the comedian that I am.”
The Survival Guide to Living with Strong Women
Living with strong women has taught Tommy three essential rules:
- Communicate: “Us guys think most chat is bakwaas! We don’t care for details! Well, I don’t!
So – If you bump into your neighbour (let’s just call her Heena) … and Heena tells you she’s having a baby with her husband Jinesh … and the baby is due next summer … tell your wife!
Cos if she meets Heena and heena tells her “I already told tommy I was pregant” but you didn’t relay that!! You’re in trouble.
Gotta talk! My wife wants me to airdrop my day and all relevant information to her! If I don’t, then I’m failing and I’m in trouble.” - Sweat the Small Stuff: “She wants details … by sharing details it’s like you care more! They want you involved in the nitty gritty- don’t ask me why … I’m just telling you how it is!”
- Be Yourself: “Sometimes you get caught up trying to say and do the right thing to keep the peace or for an easy life! But then over time, you aren’t you anymore! So hold on to what matters to you! If you gotta accept her for her quirks … she’s gotta accept you for yours! Don’t sell yourself out … even if it means you ain’t getting no loving for a few days! Be strong!”
Punjabi Mum Motivational Speeches
Growing up, Tommy’s mum mastered the art of no-nonsense motivation. “She’d say, kosh ban la pota—‘just become something.’ She didn’t pressure me to be a doctor or lawyer; she just wanted me to be about something.”
And then there were the classic moments of unintentional hilarity. Tommy recounts a time he brought home a keyring with his star sign, only to discover it depicted a graphic image.
“I remember I found a key ring in the playground which said Sagittarius on it, which is my star sign. So I took the key ring home. I didn’t even know what was on the key ring. And it turned out to be a sex position. It was just an image of these two people, and it just said Sagittarius. But I, in my innocence, I was about 11, didn’t even know what that was. And she found it. And I remember the advice that she said was, when she saw it, she knew what it was. She said, “boys who have sisters don’t have things like this.” That’s all she said, and I knew what she meant”
Her chappal discipline was equally legendary. “Once, I misbehaved and hid in the bathroom, thinking I’d outsmarted her. When I finally crept out, there she was—waiting! She gave me what for, and we laugh about it to this day.”
Inspired by Love and Strength
From his mum’s unconditional love to his wife’s boundless drive, Tommy Sandhu is a man shaped by the women around him. They’ve taught him resilience, self-awareness, and the importance of balancing emotion with action—all with a generous dose of humour.
“Without them, I wouldn’t be the man or comedian I am today,” Tommy reflects. “Here’s to the women in our lives—may they keep inspiring, challenging, and loving us, chappals and all.”
